Pinkie Pie's Adventure
by Pumpkin Maaka
Summary: Something is happening to different lands and Equestria has been stuck. Pinkie Pie escaped thinking she was the only one left, now she leaves and travels far from home looking for everypony and the Elements of Harmony in hope that they might help. Along the way, she meets a strange young man. Rated M to be safe. Pinkie Pie x OC, Enjoy.
1. Pinkie Makes a Friend

**Disclaimer:** I don't own MLP FiM.  
**Rating:** M, Just to be safe. Never know what I might say or make them do.

**Pinkie Makes Friends**

Deep within the pipes and tunnels underneath an unknown land there was a pink haired girl making her way through the ruins. There was also a boy who too roamed the pipes, but he lived there as well. That is where this story begins.

He saw a flash of pink, and heard a girly, shrill voice, in the tunnel above him; he went to explore this new intruder. Grabbing a revolver from his collection of weaponry he made his way into the upper levels of this maze; suddenly he saw her and flinched back in hope he wasn't seen, she did in fact have very pink hair and bright blue eyes. He slowly peered around the corner again, her attire was a bit off considering where she was but her tattoo of three balloons on her flank made him think of that land that was invaded recently, what was that name? …Equestria! That was the name. She was digging though some rubble in a pile muttering to herself when she gasped and whipped around, studying everything with those eyes. He ducked and twirled as soon as she started to turn. Quietly she turned back to her digging and started to mumble again; he quietly slunk over and pressed the gun to her temple from behind.

The girl stopped moving and stood up slowly, "Who are you?" Even her voice was cute.. "Well I could ask you the same; you're in the pipe tunnels. Nobody ever comes down here."

"Are you loco in the coco? I'M here aren't I?" In a blur she found herself pressed to a hard chest and she had an arm around her waist holding her tight. The gun was still to her temple and more pressure was added. "Tell me who you are."

"There's nothing to tell! GASP! Where's Gummy?" She cried and the boy pulled her closer if possible and pressed his gun hard to her temple, he bent over to her height and whispered into her ear, "Tell me." She looked as best she could at his masked face wide eyed and scared,

"I'M A CHICKEN, BAGAWK!" He pulled the trigger and he found she had very good reflexes. He missed from so close. She must have moved as soon as she noticed his arm muscle twitch. The girl he was holding so tight had now turned over and was clutching to him as if she were scared. He knew she wasn't,

"Don't shoot me, you can't shoot me! I'm the only one left here, I can't find anyone! I have to find Vinyl and the elements of harmony! The girls need me!" She looked into her captors mask and he couldn't help but put his gun down, "Calm down."

He cupped her face in his hands and stared down at her, those eyes were the biggest pool of unhappiness and sorrow he had ever seen in someone from Equestria.

"My name is Pinkamena Pie; my friends call me Pinkie Pie. I'm from Equestria; my home was invaded and almost destroyed. I can't find my friends or family, anyone! This is Gummy, my pet toothless alligator." Pinkie let go and picked up a little green guy and it had attached itself to the boys arm, gnawing.

"Well, this is new... I'm sorry for pulling a gun on you but you understand." He motioned around himself, gently tugging Gummy off his arm, he handed him back to Pinkie. "What's your name?" she asked, he looked at her face with a frown behind his mask and she stared expectantly not seeing his frown. He started to move passed her and decided to smack her rump as he passed by. She made an 'eep!' sound, "Not important Pinkie babe."

Suddenly loud shrieks and screams were heard and they both whipped around to the sounds. Pinkie latched onto her new friend again with all her might, "They found me! Please," He looked down at her pleading face and those plump tits pressing onto his arm, "Please hide me!"

Screams were louder and sounded more vicious as they got closer; he sighed and picked her up, bolting it back to his home with Pinkie and Gummy. Pinkie noticed he ran through all sorts of pipes going this way and that until he dropped down and slid down a pipe. He dropped into a small room and put his cargo down quickly climbing back up into the pipe they just slid out of, "Wait! You can't leave!"

"I'm not leaving," He shouted back, "I'm closing off the pipes so those fuckers can't get in! Be a good girl and stay quiet." Pinkie pouted and shouted back, "Hey! I was just worried!"

Again he shouted back down to her with a stern voice, "Pinkie. Shut it. Or I'll shove it down your throat and make you beg to have a good fuck!" Pinkie sat still and looked to the floor blushing and mumbling about how crude her new friend was. She looked at Gummy and smiled. He was all she had left; she didn't know where everyone was. It made her sad to think about it but she knew there was no time to mope; maybe this new friend would help her.

The boy slid back out of the pipe and landed in front of Pinkie in a crouching position, startled Pinkie looked back up into the mask again.

"Well those are locked. Nobody is getting to us. Let's go." He stood up as best he could in the small room; Pinkie stood tall and noticed how tall the boy was. "See Gummy, one day you will be as big as him!" Pinkie smiled and her friend blinked awkwardly at her, she turned back to her tall friend.

"Where are we going?" He was walking away and he turned back to her, "Come with me and I'll show you." He held his hand out to her and she looked at it, smiled and took it.

"Okie dokie lokie!"


	2. The Boy Who Wears the Mask

**Disclaimer:**** I don't own MLP FiM.  
****Rating:**** M, Just to be safe. Never know what I might say or make them do.**

**The Boy Who Wears the Mask**

He stood leaning over Pinkie's small frame watching her sleep. He was quiet and thoughtful as he watched her stir; she stretched and stayed in an awkward position. He chuckled and walked over to sit on his couch, well that was what he liked to call it. As soon as he and Pinkie had made it into his home he told her to sit down and he would get a drink for her, when he came back she had fallen asleep. He put her in his bed and wrapped her in his old blankets, she was so small and delicate he wondered how she managed to find anything she needed and to fight for it.

Pinkie stirred again and he thought nothing of it, he continued to sit there and ponder when he heard small footsteps coming closer. He opened his eyes and Pinkie was wrapped in his blanket standing before him, "What's wrong?" She asked him. He sat still contemplating whether or not he wanted to pretend he was asleep when she spoke again,

"I know you're not asleep. What do I call you if I don't know your name? It's not very fun having a friend that won't tell me their name! I know everyone's name!" He sighed and moved over for her to sit down with him. She plopped down with a big smile and snuggled into, what she deemed, her blanket, and turned to smile again, "Okay, I'll name you then! I How about.. Masked Man or Snooty Booty! Or—"

He covered her mouth with his hand and leaned in close to her, "Pinkie what have I said about being quiet?" He let go of her mouth and motioned a hole and a finger with his hands and made them go together really fast. He noticed Pinkie's blush as she looked down and stayed quiet, "Hey…" She looked up at him and he spoke gently to her,

"You know I would never… I mean, you're cute and all that shit, but I wouldn't' do _THAT_ to you. That's not my kind of thing. That's more along the lines that Ra would make JJ do with him." She stared at him in disgust and anger, he moved away a little.

"That's just wrong Snooty Booty!" She yelled, he threw his arms in the air and let them land limply at his side while shaking his head. "Look if I give you something to call me, will the weird names stop?" "Yes!" Pinkie all but beamed at him, seems her want of knowing names is really strong; Wonderful.

"… You can call me Hayz." She blinked and frowned at him. "But why Hayz? Is that a code name? Why can't I know your real name?" There are so many questions in her little head. Hayz got up and walked over to his desk and sat down, he flipped on monitors and all sorts of knick knacks before he turned back to Pinkie. "Why don't you explore a bit? This room is only part of where I live." He turned back to his desk and began typing and looking around,

"There are many places I'm sure you would have fun in. I've blocked off the entrances and exits so there won't be anybody to bother you. Or maybe you can sleep some more. Whatever babe, but you can't be here." Pinkie stood and walked over to Hayz, he turned in his chair and she knelt down to sit on his lap. "But why?" He looked into her sad eyes and again thought of how strange to see Equestria's party pony to be so unhappy. He heard that nothing ever dampened her spirit, not even when everyone was in danger before. Apparently she had a Party Cannon.

"Because I'm going to put on the kinkiest porn I've got and jack off for three hours then go find a chick to fuck." Pinkie had on that disgusted face again and got up pretty fast. "Um… okay. I'm going to go take another nap." And she made a quick exit over to the bed and wrapped up in Hayz's blankets again.

Hayz chuckled and turned back to his monitor. He had calls to make and that wasn't easy when he had a pink haired party girl in his bed. He sighed and typed in some keys before a man appeared on screen.

"Well fuck me and call me daddy. Since when do you ever call?" Hayz snorted and crossed his arms, "Since when does Ra ever let you answer his calls?" The man on screen tilted his head and frowned, "Since Ra is too busy. What can I do for you? … Is that an alligator?" Hayz looked down at his arm and noticed Gummy was attached to him again gnawing away like there was no tomorrow.

He sighed and the man on screen laughed, "Isn't funny JJ. Look I need to talk to Ra, is he there?" JJ tilted his head again and smiled, "Of course he is." JJ leaned back into the chair and Ra had appeared from under the desk with a glare to kill set on his burnt face, "What is it? I was busy."

"HOLY CRANKY DOODLE DONKEY!" Hayz whipped around and saw Pinkie staring with wide eyes at his companions burnt features; he turned back to the screen and simply said "It's about her."

"Dude is that a chick? Where the shit did you find her? Is her hair fucking _pink?_" JJ had started to ask questions. Hayz sighed and looked to Pinkie, "I told you to stay away from here." Pinkie trotted over to Haze and knelt down to him and put her head in his lap.

"I don't want to be alone. I've been alone for so long.." JJ was still asking questions when Ra had spoken, "Hayz." He looked back to the screen. Ra had a blank face set and JJ, who stopped talking, looked nervous, "Where did she come from? Judging by her flank, she is Equestrian; But in your ruins? What on earth could a pony want down there? Why don't you tell me Pinkamena? Why are you in the ruins?"

Pinkie looked startled and glared at the screen, "How do you know my name?" Ra smiled an unfriendly smile, "Oh I know everyone. It's what a Death God is supposed to know." Pinkie quickly hit some buttons on a keyboard in an attempt to close this session, she succeeded. "Pinkie I needed to talk to him." Hayz stood with crossed arms and a Gummy still attached.

"That man is burnt to cinders! No wonder he was so 'IM A DEATH GOD HEAR ME ROAR'. I didn't like him, which is weird 'cause I like everyone, so I made him stop looking at me! GASP! Is your face like that?" Again with the questions. "Pinkie his name is Ra. He is a good friend and in these times, he is someone we need. I will call him back and this time you WILL stay over there. And take Gummy, he keeps gnawing me and it's getting really weird."

Pinkie took Gummy and settled him in her arms. She wanted to ask so many questions but she wasn't sure where it would get her. "Please tell me about yourself." Hayz looked at her with surprise. "No." He said firmly. "Hayz I'm tired and I've lost my happiness. I just want to know who I'm with right now, you're no Applejack; you're not honest. Or Fluttershy; you aren't shy but you are friendly. And you are Rarity, Twilight and Dashy. You have a generous heart, you're very smart, and you're brave."

"Pinkie babe, I don't see your point." He sat down and began typing again. "They were my friends. You remind me of them. I just want to know you and not people I already know." Hayz sighed and stilled his typing. "To bed with you, I'll be there in a few minutes."

Pinkie walked back to the bed, wrapped in the blankets and hugged Gummy close. Suddenly she felt weight next to her and rolled to see Hayz looking down at her. "What do you want to know Pinkie?"

"I want to know how old you are, your favorite color, and your favorite cupcake flavor! Ooh I make really good cupcakes!" He sighed and got comfy, Pinkie moved over a bit to let him do so.

"You have to tell me more about you. Including anything I ask. Deal?" Pinkie smiled and nodded, "Okie dokie lokie!"

"I am twenty-three years old. I have been here for as long as I can remember, and _no _my face is not like Ra's face. But I wear my mask for specific reasons. My favorite color happens to be pink, lucky you. And I don't like cupcakes." Pinkie gasped and looked horrified, he chuckled and continued, "I have one green eye and one blue eye, my hair is some god awful color, I don't really know I haven't really looked at it much lately and I'm an assassin. I love women and porn and tend to get carried away with jacking off."

"You're kind of gross you know." Pinkie smiled at him and he laughed down at her, "It's who I am. Your turn dearie." Pinkie giggled and started,

"My name is Pinkamena Pie. I lived in Ponyville, Equestria. I worked at Sugarcube Corner and lived happily. I have five very good friends. I am seventeen years old, and I represent joy and laughter. I make the best cupcakes in the world! My hair is naturally pink and straight, even though it's poofy and curly right now. My eyes are blue. Um I guess that's all! And that was how Equestria was made!"

Hayz chuckled down at Pinkie at her last outburst. "What about someone to love?" Pinkie glanced up and blurted out, "Nobody!"

"Ever experience physical love?" Again she blurted happily, "Nope!" Hayz kept his gaze downward as Pinkie rolled about happily in his bed. Supposed he couldn't get in her pants like he hoped. Oh well, always more fish in the sea. Well maybe he could try, no harm in that.

"Everything bad happened before I could find anyone I may have wanted to date," He snapped out of his thoughts and wrapped an arm around Pinkie. "Bad things can be good things too."

"Not when your five feet tall!" Again she makes him laugh.

"Oh Pinkie, come snuggle and go to sleep. We can do whatever you need tomorrow." Pinkie sat up and looked about quickly, "What time is it?" She asked. "About midnight. Come keep daddy warm."

Pinkie looked down and covered her chest, "Only if you promise to never refer yourself as daddy again." He held out his arms to her and said "Deal." Pinkie laid down with him and soon she drifted off to sleep with Gummy gnawing at Hayz's arm again.

All the while though, two sets of eyes were watching them; one set was red and the other black.

**A/N: Well not much happened in this chapter. Other than Haze admitting he has a porn stash somewhere. Will Pinkie find it? Let's hope so for some good LOLZ.**


	3. Now What?

**Disclaimer:**** I don't own MLP FiM.  
****Rating:**** M, Just to be safe. Never know what I might say or make them do.**

**What Now?**

Pinkie awoke to hushed whispers close to her. She figured it was Haze talking on the screen again to the weird burnt man, what was his name? Ba, Saw, Law, Paw...Tim McGraw... Ra! That's what it was. Pinkie rolled over and stretched into an awkward angle and decided it was time to get up. She rolled off the bed and made her way over to Hayz from behind his little corner that his bed was hidden behind, as soon as she could see around the corner she had turned back and slunk down low. Those two on the screen were here.

Pinkie listened closely to their hushed conversation, "Dude, are you _SURE_ I can't go in there? Girl got some nice curves; even if she has Pink hair... Pink though, honestly." Ra and Hayz turned to JJ and shushed him. "Just asking bro..." He mumbled and sat down on the couch. "Listen Hayz, she can't be here. Equestrian ponies are being hunted and, along with whatever the fuck is after her," Ra pointed towards the curtain the bedroom was behind, "We will be attacked too if they find out she is here."

Hayz looked over towards the curtain and noticed a small curl of pink sticking out. He thought she had been awake; he thought about what Ra had said and decided they would leave. Tonight if they had to, he could always come back anyway.

"Pinkie come out. I can see some of your curls." Pinkie deadpanned and cursed her hair to suffer the wrath of all the cupcake monsters for its traitorous deed. Sighing she walked out and stood next to Hayz. "My hair has betrayed me." JJ snapped up off the couch and knelt down to Pinkie's height

"Is your hair naturally pink? Jesus is all of your hair pink?" She gave JJ a flat stare and said in a stern voice, "My name is PINKamena. PINKIE. What do you think I was named for? Being short?" Hayz and Ra snorted their laughter and Ra spoke again,

"Pinkamena—" he started, "PINKIE. I go by Pinkie Pie." Ra sighed and continued, "Alright, Pinkie, what are you doing in these ruins. The tunnels can be just like a labyrinth, they change and can be closed off. You could have been down here for a long time." She stared in Ra's black eyes and sighed. She figured they would discover her secret sooner or later.

"I already told Hayz... I'm looking for the Elements of harmony. I represent joy and laughter! But.. I can't find them. I've looked everywhere," Pinkie plopped down on the couch next to JJ and he scooted away a bit, Pinkie glared his way. "Hey! I'm not going to turn you pink just 'because I'M pink! Anyway.. I've heard of the ruins before and since Celestia has scattered the Elements in a panic, maybe one would be here. "They stared at Pinkie for a while before Hayz spoke gently,

"Pinkie… I've got something I think you may want to see." She perked up and stood up quickly; following Hayz with her eyes he went into a room she hadn't been in yet. He came back with a small gem that was golden in color and another gem that was green in color.

Pinkie gasped and dove at Hayz with all her might, Ra stepped to the side and let them crash to the floor in a tangled mess. "Fuck Pinkie! I know I'm sexy but I haven't had anyone dive at me before! Well… Except when it was someone trying to kill me…" Pinkie grabbed the gems and stuffed them into her small top.

"We playing go fish?" Hayz stared up at the girl straddling his chest. Pinkie looked beyond happy and bounced up and down making Hayz wheeze a bit.

"Applejack and Fluttershy! Honesty and kindness! Oh where did you find them!" She all but beamed down at him. He smiled behind his mask and rolled her over until he was on top between her thighs. "I move around a lot. I found them a while back. Never thought they would be anything much though; until you had mentioned your friends."

"Oh thank you! GUMMY! It's time to party!"

Ra and JJ were surprised by Pinkie's ability to throw a party with so little so fast but decided they would stay for a while. What harm could it do really? When they finally left JJ was on a sugar high and Ra was covered in icing glaring at his excited companion.

"And when we get home I'm gonna eat all of the chips and candy! Then I'm gonna go hit the bar and eat all those little nuts and BAM! I'll come home, be naked in your bed with the biggest fucking dil—" Ra had slapped his hand over JJ's mouth and pulled him close with the other, "JJ if you don't shut up I'm going to do horrible things to you." JJ giggled behind the hand and Ra spoke lowly, "Horrible things you don't like."

He had never been quieter in their lives.

Back in Hayz home Pinkie was still happily jumping about with Gummy and telling Hayz a million things at once. When he finally managed to catch her, she had jumped off the couch claiming she could fly, he took her to bed. He looked behind him at the mess and decided cleaning could be done tomorrow.

She squirmed, wiggled and all but screamed her excitement and Hayz soon realized it would be easier to just let her get up and run her energy out. He soon fell asleep to Pinkie's voice singing in the next room,

"My name is Pinkie Pie! And I am here to say, I'm gonna make you smile, and I will brighten up your day-aaay! …"

A few hours later Pinkie walked into Hayz bedroom and looked down at him sleeping. She crawled in next to him and snuggled under his chin; he stirred a little and wrapped her up in his arms. Without notice he pulled back and unbuckled his mask, he threw it to the floor and rolled back to Pinkie.

"You took off your mask." He opened his eyes and she could see the age and exhaustion in his face clearly. He sighed and whispered, "Pinkie I'm not getting any younger." She snorted and rolled over hogging the blankets.

"You're twenty-three! That's not old!" She giggled for a while yet and when he thought she was asleep he reached down to grab another blanket. Suddenly she spoke; startling him. "Now what?" she asked. Hayz didn't understand what she meant and he really didn't care.

"I don't know what you mean Pinkamena."

"I mean, I have to leave. Will I go alone or will you come with me? I don't know where to go next or what to do." She sighed and rolled back over facing Hayz, "I want to stay here but I know I can't."

"Don't think about it too much. Tomorrow we will decide what to do and whether or not I will go along. For now we sleep… or you give me a blowjob. A kinky blowjob." Pinkie's eyes flew open and she stared into Hayz's green and blue eyes. "That means I want teeth and a lot of deep action"

Before he knew what happened, Hayz was kicked in the shin and got a slap to the head by an angry Pinkie. "Okay! I give! No more hitting! I'm delicate." Pinkie snorted and rolled over again, this time to stay there and sleep.

Hayz stared at her back contemplating whether or not he dared to get close after that kick and slap; he decided he wanted to hold her little frame even if it meant another whack. He wrapped himself close and held her tight.

Pinkie was almost asleep when she heard him whisper, "It's been a long time since I've held anybody." And she drifted off with the excitement of dreams ahead.

**A/N: Well... They are still at Hayz's house.  
Next chapter we find out if they leave together or if they go separate ways.  
And why does Hayz want to be so close? Maybe something happened once upon a time. **


	4. Madness Returns

**Chapter Four:**

**Madness Returns**

**A/N:**** Ghost Busters is an awesome movie. Alice: Madness Returns is a bitchin' game. But alas neither belongs to me, nor does the name of this chapter. Wooden Toaster and the Living Tombstone, and their song Rainbow Factory also do not belong to me.  
MLP FiM doesn't belong to me either. Or the Cloudsdale story. GEEZ I'M POOR… ; n ;  
Thank you MLP Fan Labor Wiki for supplying me with information behind the Rainbow Factory and Cloudsdale. I underlined a section as a quote I used from here. So not mine.**

**Luka, Hayz and the name of the city do however, belong to me. **

It was early into the next day when Pinkie woke with a start. There were those screams; those monsters were closer to her again. Pinkie lay still with wide eyes and her heart pounding harder with every second.

Hayz woke up to the screams as well, but he paid no mind to them. He did hear them every now and then but he was confident enough they couldn't get through his systems. He untangled himself from the blankets and lay still for a while just waking up. He noticed Pinkie was curled up into a tight ball. Curious he rolled to face her.

"Hey Pinkie babe, you up?" She didn't answer him. He scanned her with his eyes and noticed her small form shaking. Maybe those screams really scared her; the women he knew were too vicious to be scared. It was as if they wanted nothing more than to be attacked so they could smack some freaky ass.

"Pinkamena. I know you're awake." He nudged her with his foot and she still didn't move. He sighed and got up, maybe he should check they system anyway. He grabbed his mask and latched it back on, walking out of the make shift room he lazily sat down at his desk and clicked on the screens. Looks like those things got past his gate.

_Whatever,_ He thought. _They can't get very far without being raped by my awesomeness._

"You know I wouldn't peg you as someone to watch erotophonophilia or gerontophilia. Really should store that shit somewhere safe. Or you know… delete your history."

Hayz twirled in his chair and toppled over onto the floor on his back. Looking over at his couch, he saw an old friend.

"One day I will kill you and holy fuck… it will be one hell of a kill for my trophy case…And what the shit is wrong with my porn? Quit lookin' assface! How the hell did you even get in here Luka? Those things are bangin' at my front door and you waltz in?" Hayz let the rest of his body topple down from his chair and managed to sit on it properly facing his friend.

"Well a little birdy told me you had a pink haired beauty in your lovely home. I was curious. And PLENTY is wrong with your… desires, ugh." Luka smiled politely. Hayz cringed in his mask, that boy has one hell of a creepy smile. He sighed and began to tell Luka about what he knew of Pinkie.

"So now she is here, I still haven't gotten a blowjob, and she hogs the blankets. Oh and this thing," Hayz held up his arm to show Gummy once again gnawing at his arm, "Keeps on gnawing on me. She calls it Gummy, says it will grow up to be a huge gator or whatever.."

Luka giggled and stood up. "Well I do believe I want to meet her! Is she in your bed?" He began to walk towards the bedroom when Hayz grabbed his arm. Luka turned to his friend confused by the sudden closeness; Hayz never touched anyone.

"You are full of surprises today. Thought you hated touching?" Luka's smile never faltered. Hayz let go of him and wiped his hand on his sleeve.

"Sorry man, it's just I think those things have really freaked her out. She was shaking this morning, and I know it isn't cold in here."

Luka turned to his friend completely and stared into his masked eyes, "Maybe it's that mask of yours. CREEEEEPY!" He waved his hands in front of him to prove his point.

"Hey I look damn fine so cheese it!" Hayz had his hands crossed across his chest and pouted, not that Luka could see.

"Well I think it's ugly. You have such pretty eyes!" Luka giggled and turned around to go into the bedroom. Hayz followed him shouting all the way,

"Luka you fed me those messed up brownies and let me finish two bottles of Bacardi, and a damn case of daiquiris, that was the only time you have EVER seen any of me. I regret nothing."

All conversation was cut short when the boys walked in to see Pinkie sitting up in the bed rocking back and forth mumbling something to herself with wide eyes and a twitching smile.

"Uh.. Pinkamena? Are you okay?" Hayz reached a hand slowly towards her and as quickly as he had the gun on her for the first time, she had a knife in his arm. Hayz recoiled and stared as his arm. Pinkie had a vicious side? Could be some good fun in there.

Luka yanked the knife out and put it on a little nightstand; he sat down on the bed next to Pinkie and slowly put his arms up to show her he hand nothing on him,

"You're Pinkie?" He asked, Pinkie slowly nodded her head and turned her gaze to Hayz who was walking around looking for the first aid kid. Her smile got bigger and she started to giggle.

"Well then, care to tell me what's wrong? Did the big bad ghost buster scare you? I think his mask is god awful, so I don't blame— "

"They are coming to get me again. To bring me back to that place!" Pinkie got to her feet in a flash and ran out of the room to dive into the couch and bury herself in a mound of blankets. Luka followed her into the living room and spotted Hayz stitching his arm. "Infected?" He asked,

"Nah, she just surprised me. I'm telling you it's those things, they scare her. Must have kidnapped her at one point or something.." He was babbling on whilst slowing pushing the needle in and out. Stitches hurt.

"Where's Gummy?" Pinkie shot out from the blankets and scanned the room, her eyes fell on Luka who held his hands in mock surrender whilst pointing at Hayz with a smirk,

"I do believe chew toy might know."

"Yeah, yeah, tell Gummy to lay off the gnawing eh? My pants are wet.. not in the good way either." Hayz plopped his foot up on the couch and Gummy slid off into Pinkie's hands. She quickly dove back under the blankets and the boys could hear her talking about evil plans and weird parties to Gummy.

"Okay well maybe I'll come back another day. She seems…"

"Retarded?" Hayz tried, Luka deadpanned and continued, "No… She seems a little preoccupied with something else. I'll bid you adu, and see you around Hayz." Luka turned to Pinkie and smiled.

"Pinkie on another day I'll come back, it was nice to meet you though!" Pinkie didn't respond, Luka chuckled and said his goodbyes. He checked Hayz's arm and left. It was about eight AM when Hayz decided he had enough of Pinkie storing everything she could into the couch. He picked her up and brought her over to one of his pipes. He put her down and made her look at him.

"Pinkamena; I know those things are fucked up. I know you are probably scared of them…" She shook her head yes and he continued, "But they are not getting in here. I know it must have been hell to get past them if they caught you, but right now I want to know who 'they' is."

She stared into his mask and her face suddenly cracked into a smile. Her eyes were unfocused and she began to laugh hysterically. He didn't back away from her but stared down at her as she broke down. In a lot of ways she reminded him of Alice. But Pinkie couldn't go on the brink of insanity like Alice could.

Slowly her giggling died down and she began to sob quietly. Then there was the bang on the door which sent Pinkie flying at Hayz; she drug him into the bedroom under the covers, claiming the entire way that blankets were magical devices that protected all people from monsters if they hide under them. There was the Pinkie he knew. Another loud bang was heard and he swore crawling out from under the blankets. There were the assholes he knew.

He grabbed his backpack he kept for emergencies, if he ever needed to leave immediately, and grabbed Pinkie's arm from under the blanket. She slunk out a little bit and he pulled her some more.

"Pinkie we are leaving. Now. Grab your shit quickly." He let go of her arm and walked over to his screens. How did they get in? Ah, that's how. One of his pipes was unlocked. He blamed Luka for that and quickly shut down everything, Pinkie emerged from his room with her bag on her shoulder and Gummy in her arms.

"They got in! You said they couldn't get in!" Pinkie sobbed hysterically. Hayz felt bad, he really did. But quite frankly he couldn't stop the words from coming out,

"Listen sugartits I don't give two shits what happens to you, in this world we have now it's everyone for themselves. I'm not into the whole group thing. You die? I don't stop. My ass is probably more useful than yours."

With that he turned and grabbed his communicator. Pinkie stood still with a shocked and unhappy face. Her mouth was slightly agape and her tears had stopped falling. She never felt more alone, she thought she had someone finally. She hardened her face and followed Hayz up into a pipe,

"Where does this pipe lead?" She asked. "Upper levels of Forgotten Ruins of Giselle. We need to leave this place, maybe come back at one point but for now it's not safe."

Pinkie nodded and kept climbing through the maze of pipes until finally Hayz stopped and looked back to Pinkie, he held a finger to his mask in a 'quiet' sign. He slowly stood as much as he could and heaved over a manhole lid. He slowly stuck his head out and searched the area with his eyes.

God knew what was actually out there and what could be watching right now, but he slowly lowered himself back down and motioned for Pinkie to follow him. They climbed out of the manhole and Pinkie looked around. She wasn't sure which part of the city they were in and she doubted Hayz would let her look at her map, but she was positive she wasn't going to leave his side.

Hayz checked his communicator; it was eight thirty two. It had only been a few hours since they woke. He turned to Pinkie who was looking around at her surroundings, they might be hungry soon.

"Alright Pinkie we have to move." She kept her gaze towards the ruined buildings in front of her.

"Am I going with you? Or are we going separate ways?" She asked. "Regardless what I tell you I'm more than likely going to have you follow me anyway so what does it matter?" He pulled her along, walk and talk was better than just talk.

"I need to find the other elements." Shit. He forgot about those.

"We will, but let's focus on moving right now okay?" Pinkie wanted to not like him, but it was in her to love everybody. She decided Hayz could be very nice when he wanted but she knew he could get very nasty and dark too, she didn't want to see that part of him. "Still scared to the brink of insanity?" She snapped out of her thoughts and moved to walk beside him.

"I'm fine." He stopped and turned to her. If she could see his face he would be giving her that 'I don't believe a word of that shit' face. "I am." Pinkie insisted,

"Who is 'they' and what did they do to you?" He asked again, Pinkie stopped talking walking and she stared with a look of fear at Hayz.

"Wooden Toaster and the Living Tombstone."

Hayz just about dropped his shit right there. "What the fuck does a wooden toaster and a… haunted tombstone have to do with anything? You're scared of a wooden toaster? How the fuck does that even work? It would catch fire! And a tombstone that lives? What—"

"No! No, their names are Wooden Toaster and the Living Tombstone! That's their NAMES!" She tried to explain quickly.

Hayz turned around and started walking again. "Hayz? Wait!" Pinkie called to him, he kept walking and responded,

"This is why I don't fuck around with you Equestrian people. You're really messed. Think about it." He stated and kept walking but let Pinkie catch up. They were almost to the gateway portal to take them away to a different city.

"Hayz you don't understand! These ponies run the Factory! And every time I see those things I can't help but think of how all those ponies were killed! It's as if I'm reliving that nightmare in the factory, their faces and screams!" Hayz stopped and turned to Pinkie. He couldn't believe she was this nuts.. Maybe it was true. She was from a different place after all…

"Alright Pinkie, what is so bad about this place? And where is this place? Ponyville?" He questioned her; she shook her head and started to explain.

"Cloudsdale. They supply all of Equestria with its weather. Cloudsdalians tend to consider themselves superior to the other Pegasi and they will weed out any citizens not considered worthy of being part of "the Flock". The Pegasi who graduate from flight school have to pass an arduous test of physical endurance or they risk being exiled; those who are exiled tend to never be seen again.."

Hayz pulled her along to continued walking, Pinkie continued her explanation.

"I went there searching for Rainbow Dash since she is a Pegasi. What I found instead was something horrible.. I snuck into the factory and into the Rainbow Facility. I found Toaster and Tombstone with Rainbow Dash. They were killing Pegasi! I thought nobody had noticed me but when I turned to leave, Toaster was behind me. They kept me there in secret for so long; I came back when Rainbow Dash found out and demanded I be freed. "

Hayz kept his gaze forward; he couldn't believe these things happened in a place known for their apples! Their apples! "Pinkie what happened to Cloudsdale?" He asked,

"I dunno. I stayed hidden for a while after that."

Pinkie and Hayz walked together in silence for a bit before Hayz announced their arrival, "Well this is where we need to be." Pinkie looked up at a huge twirling circle. She stared at it and exclaimed it looked like a giant bubble blower stick with no stick.

"Equestria 'ponies' are fucked up. Seriously. This who Cloudsdale thing? Made me never want to go. And ponies? You look like a human to me." She turned to Hayz and gave him a silly smile.

"You're just cranky 'cause I called your portal thingymajiggy a bubble blower stick with no stick!" She exclaimed happily.

"Yeah. Yeah pretty much. Ready to go ?" He asked defeated.

"Always!" He entwined his fingers with hers and pulled her to his chest; looking down at her he spoke again, "Your mood changes really quick. First you're hysterical, then you're sad, then quiet, now you're happy again?"

"I'm going to assault you with cake." She said happily.

"Point taken." He squeezed her tighter against him,

With that Hayz said the gateway key and teleported them to another city holding hands with a pretty, and a once again happy, Pinkie Pie. And with a cake smacked onto the side of his mask, but he had that coming.

**A/N: **** I… I have reviews? Good reviews?  
; u ; Oh I am the happiest wee lass in all of Canada! Thank you!  
I had to use a reference for the story about Cloudsdale as I mentioned in the above A/N, I didn't know much about it at all so I looked and credited. And yes I know the apples are down in Ponyville in Apple Acres with the Apple family, but Hayz doesn't know that. ;  
I didn't expect this story to be noticed at all : **


	5. They Taste Like Frosting

**Chapter Five:**

**Does It Taste Like Frosting?**

**A/N:**** I give a warning, I mentioned some things that may offend people and that is why I gave this story a high rating. Hayz is quite the character, and Pinkie… well she is just Pinkie.  
MLP FiM isn't mine. I make nothing from this story. **

Pinkie felt dizzy, as soon as Hayz had said those weird words everything around her started to spin and change. She squeezed his hand tighter and clutched his arm to her chest until everything stopped spinning and she blinked a few times to make sure everything was stable. She looked around and saw she was in a small town. Looking up at Hayz she let go,

"Where are we now?" She asked. Hayz looked down at her and looked around himself. "Actually… I have no idea. This wasn't where I wanted. Stay close." He warned her seriously.

Pinkie snort laughed and decided to hop around a little bit. Hayz followed her around the small town; she was interested in everything, she hopped everywhere and opened whatever she could.

"Pinkie what don't you understand about something be dangerous?" Hayz asked her; Pinkie turned to him with her big smile and told him simply,

"Sometimes it's just really fun to be scared."

Hayz didn't understand Pinkie. He didn't understand women. Quite frankly he didn't even understand himself most of the time. So he just followed her around until she had her fill then she sat down on an old fountain that now ran dirty water. He sat down beside her looking at his feet.

"Where can we find food? And water?" He turned to her serious face and decided it didn't suit her. He thought about it for a minute and shuffled through his bad,

"Well I have some water but no food. You hungry or thirsty?" He handed a bottle of water to her and she took it. "Thank you. But I think we should find something, or maybe make a fort! I love forts! It's like a sand castle!" She exclaimed happily.

He sighed and chuckled a bit, "Pinkamena you're nuts. And serious really doesn't suit you but when your all giggly and childish it can get a little weird, I'll admit that. So when will you let me in those skimpy little bottoms of yours?"

Pinkie blushed up a storm and clamped her legs tighter together. Hayz laughed at her and decided to tease her a bit more, "No, I mean it. I enjoy a little company every now and then and quite frankly, you're the only chick I've met who doesn't want to fuck senseless. "

Pinkie gasped and turned towards Hayz shouting profanities until she gasped and screamed, "Dear Celestia, you're a man whore?" Hayz barked out a laugh while Pinkie scooted further away.

"Nah, just lonely. Think about it babe," He scooted closer to Pinkie until he could wrap an arm around her shoulders and used the other to stretch out in front of him, "This place is full of ass waiting for a spanking. And with those things out there? It's hard to get any action done." He put his arm down and Pinkie held her bottled water to her chest.

"Are you loco in the coco?" She asked with a half lidded stare. He thought about it for a minute and decided that he was, a little, loco in the coco. "Yes."

Pinkie took his arm from her shoulders and stood up. She turned to him and demanded he stop trying to get into her panties. He shrugged and stood up as well, "Hey can't blame a guy for trying. You sure you don't wanna play eel in the cave?"

He got another cake to his mask.

"Woman! Do you have any idea how hard it is to clean this thing?" He ripped off his mask and started to throw the cake back at her; suddenly he stopped and looked at his hands. Cake? Where the hell did she get the cake?

"Pinkie… Where did you get this cake?" She stared at him and looked at her hand which was loaded with cake, ready to be thrown.

"I never leave home without my party cannon. It just so happens, I put the cake in the cannon. Oh!" She quickly ran at Hayz and he dropped his mask to catch a certain flying pony, "I found food. Well, I found cake. Dessert!"

He blinked in confusion and deadpanned. "Where the shit did you get a fucking cannon?"

"I already told you! I never leave home without my party cannon. I must have put my confetti in the oven again…" She giggled, he let her go and gave her a look that said 'are you fucking kidding me' and bent down to pick up his mask.

"Pinkamena." He stood his height and looked down at her, "Yes?" She had a broad grin and he had a serious face. Finally he took a deep breath and began again,

"I don't know where the fuck you pulled the cannon out of. Please tell me that your hair is not a portal. That much pink fluff is scary as it is."

Pinkie threw her cake at him.

Finally after a war of cake the two sat down and ate some of it. It was sugary and Hayz didn't really like it but whatever, things that are given in life should be accepted how they are. They were quiet for a while and Hayz was licking his hand when Pinkie shot up from her seat.

He didn't know what she was staring at but she was doing it very intently. He slowly stood up with her and grabbed their things; shoving his mask in her bag. He got behind her and whispered in her hear while looking around, "Please tell me you're just being weird and see something shiny?"

She shook her head and backed up closer to Hayz and reached her hand into her bag, Gummy rubbed up on her hand and she gave him a quick pet and brought her hand back.

Quick like a bunny Pinkie bolted and Hayz saw a flash of something big and orange trailing her, he ran after her and saw she was up on a roof. How she got there so fast he didn't know but he saw what she was screaming at.

At the base of the building was an orange colored fisher. A very large and very scary looking fisher. Great, just what the doctor ordered.

Hayz reached in his bag and pulled out an Uzi Sub-machine Gun, aiming at the fisher he shot it in the head. Hayz slowly made his way over ready to shoot again if needed. He kicked the things head and shot it to be sure it was dead and looked up to Pinkie. She wasn't there.

"Fucking woman.. I'm getting her a leash and a gag. I've decided." He sighed and started to climb his way up the building. He reached the roof and saw Pinkie sitting in the middle playing with Gummy. He heaved himself over the ledge and made his way over to the two. Hayz was about to tell her his wonderful plan of a gag and leash when she interrupted him,

"Where do you get all these guns anyway?" He closed his mouth and sat down next to her. She looked at him with her smile,

"First you pull a double-action revolver on me and now you yank out a Uzi sub-machine gun! Where did you get them?" He stared down at her and simply said,

"Sometimes people do things they aren't proud of. And this," He held up his gun, "Is something I wish I had never learned." She frowned at him and rolled herself onto his chest and pinched his cheeks, "Oh don't be such a cranky doodle! I'm thankful you did!"

"Pinkie I don't like being sat on. Get off or get on my face, that's the only sitting I want." She quickly removed herself from him and slapped his chest, "You're so crude! You wouldn't like it if I started telling you to whip it out!"

He quickly sat up and stared at her with a pleading face. "Oh yes. Yes I would." Pinkie slapped a hand to her face and moaned in frustration. He was so weird! But she did like him. It was nice to have someone around.

"Let's go back to the portal and try again? Where are we going anyway?" She asked him.

"We need to get to my other safe house. You happened to stumble into my actual home, but I have many others scattered in different places. We are heading to Caelum Rosea." He explained; Pinkie held her hand up and thought for a minute.

"But I thought I couldn't stay, not that YOU couldn't stay." She looked at him questionably and he shrugged.

"Grew fond of you?" Pinkie stood up and walked to the ledge, she started climbing down and shouted back to Hayz,

"That was a lame excuse!" He hurried after her and looked down the ledge, he jumped back in surprise when she shot back up and was literally in his face,

"I grew fond of you too." She giggled.

She tasted like candy, or maybe fruit. A fruity candy? Maybe it was just the cake. Either way Hayz decided he really liked her lips. Their kiss ended too soon in his opinion. It wasn't sloppy or anything, just a simple kiss. It was weird.

"You taste funny." He told her and made her start her climb down so he could as well,

"You taste like my cake! Did you like the cake?" She asked happily, she plopped herself on the ground next to the fisher and scooted away from it. Hayz lazily plopped down next to it as well and scooted towards her,

"That's what they taste like. They taste like frosting." He exclaimed and started back towards the portal. Pinkie followed behind and questioned him about what tasted like frosting.

"Your lips babe." She giggled and hopped the rest of their way there. Pinkie was about to turn the corner but realized she wasn't sure where Gummy was. When she turned she had her answer.

"I give up. It can gum me all it wants. It's like a toothless hooker trying to give the kinkiest blowjob it can!" He shouted and waved his arm around. Gummy sure did like to gnaw.

"He does that to my mane sometimes! It's okay!"

He walked past her with Gummy still attached to his arm and a hopping girl behind him, "Your mane? You mean your hair right? 'Cause if not I want those bottoms off. Now." He reached the portal and grabbed Pinkie close again.

"I meant my hair. You just want to know if I'm a natural Pinkette!" He looked down at her and, with a noise like a snort, said,

"With your hair who the shit doesn't want to solve that mystery?" Pinkie laughed and rubbed her face against Gummy who was still latched onto Hayz's arm. Hayz looked back at the portal and tried another gate way key.

Pinkie decided she hated these portals. When they arrived in a new place again Hayz smiled and told her that this was the right place. She looked around and saw this place actually had people… real people! She gasped and ran towards everyone screaming her name was Pinkie Pie and how she knows everyone in Ponyville and everything else her big poof of a head could think of. She ran back to Hayz and saw he had his mask back on.

She figured it was because he didn't want people to see his face. "Hayz? Where do we go now?" She hopped in front of him and kept bouncing up and down.

He laughed at her and pointed to a hotel a couple blocks away, "There. Shikaku no Arashi."

Pinkie stared at the fancy looking hotel. It reminded her of a forest, she didn't care for it; she turned back to Hayz and wrinkled her nose. He laughed and put his arm around her to guide her on their way.

There were a lot of different people Pinkie noticed, but she didn't recognize anyone she had hoped. She kept her eyes open for any Equestrian folk but by the time they zigzagged their way through the crowds to the hotel, she was disappointed. No pony was there it seemed. She shrugged it off and entered the hotel with Hayz right behind her.

She changed her mind. She liked the forest; it was like being in Viridian Forest!

"This is so much bigger on the inside! It's just like my game! Oh god wild things are going to fly at me and use 'harden'!" Hayz stared down at her with a look of bewilderment. He had no idea what that meant, the name was familiar… what was it from again?

"Um.. Would that be from a game called Pokey-man?" Pinkie did her famous gasp and turned away from Hayz.

"Never have I been so insulted! It's Pokémon! Not Pokey-man!" She huffed and turned away. Apparently this was a big deal. Hayz shook his head and walked up to the front desk, Pinkie followed suit still in denial that someone didn't know what Pokémon was. Hayz slapped the little bell dramatically about ten times giggling until a girl with neon green hair came out from under the counter.

"Hit that again and I will make sure your life is miserable. Oh… Hayz, hey. If I had of known you were coming I would have hidden all the bells." Pinkie held back a bark of laughter.

Hayz slapped the bell again and leant on the counter, "Hey Manda. Do you still have the key to my house here?" He asked.

"If I didn't I would be a horrible friend." She reached into her mouth and pulled a key from her throat. She gave the key to Hayz and they said their thanks ready to leave until Manda asked who his pretty pinkie was.

"Oh this is Pinkie Pie. I found her near my house and decided I needed a new fuck toy."

Pinkie slapped his arm and turned to Manda, "Hi I'm Pinkie Pie! I'm from Ponyville!"

"Well you certainly look bubbly; might be great for this depressing town." Manda smiled at Pinkie and leant over her counter.

"Yeah but not much of a fuck toy; she won't even let me give her a lick…" Manda smacked Hayz and told him to behave and get out of her hotel. The two laughed saying their goodbyes and soon were making their way towards a small house.

"Pinkie?" Hayz looked to Pinkie who was again looking at everything with a happy smile, she turned her head his way; her smile never faltered. "You're gonna stay with me. I need some company that is, preferably, not crazy."

Pinkie jumped Hayz and screamed her joy, "I would love to stay with you! Are we going to look for the elements? Are we having an adventure? Will there be time for parties? I'm the best party pony!"

Hayz chuckled at Pinkie and carried her to his little house. Once in front of it Pinkie was admiring everything, calling it cute. But Hayz was more interested in why the door wasn't locked. Maybe Manda forgot to lock it the last time she was here? That couldn't be, he talked to her a few weeks ago and she had been there just that day to make sure everything was okay.

Before Hayz could grab her Pinkie ran past him and dove into the door, eager to see what was inside. She looked around and suddenly screamed a loud war cry and dove in another room, Hayz bolted in after her worried it was something to hurt the little pinkette but when he saw her sitting next to another girl with her feet tied to her hands he laughed and put everything down.

"And who is this Pinkie? A friend?" He asked, "Not a clue. But she had a pretty blue gem around her and I thought it was mine. And here we are!" She turned to the hog tied girl, "Cake?" She asked with a giggle.

Hayz decided he didn't like this girl. She has a strange costume on that reminded him of a hooker trying to be cute. Her hair had a green tint to it and her eyes were yellow. Fairly small girl but pudgy in the right places. "Who are you?"

"You don't know who I am? I've been waiting for you to come back! We had such a connection! I—" Hayz stopped her there and took Pinkie away, all the while the other girl was screaming at him. Pinkie turned to him and smooshed his cheeks the best she could with his mask on,

"Someone has a girlfriend who is aaangry! To the party canon! Get the cake!" Pinkie gasped and ran around screaming about flying pigs. "And that was how Equestria was made!" She held her arms up high and laughed about everything.

Hayz had no idea what to do. Did she just..? And then with the cake..? He didn't know. Nor did he care. He sulked back into the room with the other girl and shut the door. Pinkie, however, was too busy running around making everything party worthy and determining whether or not there should be candy. Maybe streamers?

Yes. There shall be MANY streamers she decided.


	6. Those Unholy, Frilly, Deadly THINGS!

**Chapter Six**

**Those Unholy, Frilly, Deadly… THINGS.**

**A/N: Warning: Crude/strong language and suggestive themes.  
I blame Hayz and his dirty mind. Which happens to be my mind. Damn.  
Read on if you like, I gave my warning.**

Hayz came out of the room, silently closing the door and stopped dead at the horror his eyes have just lain upon. Everything was pink. And it was everywhere… He slowly crept forward, avoiding stepping on anything. He made his way into the kitchen area. The first thing he noticed was the wonderful smell of fresh baked goods; the second thing he noticed was a practically naked Pinkie. Everything except her skimpy swim bottoms were gone and she had an apron on, covering her chest. Barely.

"Um.. Pinkie, what are you doing?" He asked, she turned to him and screamed. Startled he flinched back and had to brace himself at a flying Pinkie coming his way. He caught her and they twirled around at the impact.

"Look! I made muffins! And cake! And ICING!" She exclaimed happily.

"Where are your clothes? Why are you wearing an apron?" Hayz noticed she gave him one of those looks that said 'DAFUQ' and he hung his head sighing. "I'm never getting any. I know. I know."

"No, that's not it." Hayz's head snapped up and he clamped his arms tighter around Pinkie, "Pinkie say what now?" She laughed at him and gave him a hug as best she could, "I only have one set of clothes. That was all I managed to take with me when I left Equestria.. I wash them whenever I can but I try not to get them dirty. Otherwise it's even more gross."

Hayz sighed and put her down. "You could always wear something of mine. I don't mind babe." Pinkie screamed of happiness again and ran back to make more sugary goodness.

"Oh Hayz, where did that girl go?" He froze on the spot. Should he tell her what he did? Or where she was now? He figured if he wanted her trust he should..

"Pinkamena.. She won't be coming here again." Pinkie stopped stirring her icing and exclaimed more than questioned,

"You got rid of her the bad way didn't you?" Pinkie continued her stirring and decided the color wasn't deep enough to match the rest of her decorations. She added more coloring and began to stir again.

"I'm not that horrible babe. Honestly I'm not! I just.. Okay look she had to go. I knew who she was and quite frankly, I didn't care for her. We banged a few times, yeah. But she knows what I look like; she also knows a fair bit about me. God knows who the fuck she told!" He exclaimed quickly and tried to talk a lot with his hands. He looked like a wacky arm inflatable tube man.

Pinkie laughed at Hayz and turned to him. "I've learned that sometimes that happens. And in the way our world is now, I have seen it a fair bit. I could have made her Pinkie Promise though! Does this look like it matches the decorations?" She shoved her mixing bowl of icing at Hayz.

He took off his mask to get a better look at the color and looked around the room, "Nah, needs to be a bit darker." He concluded. Pinkie frowned and added a smidge more of coloring and began stirring again. Hayz figured she didn't really care what happened to the girl,

"Her name was Lativia." Pinkie stopped stirring and stared at Hayz, his green and blue eyes bore into her head. She didn't care for that stare,

"Okay?" And she went back to her stirring. Hayz sighed and decided for good that she really didn't care. He walked to the counter Pinkie was at and stared at her body again. Without much thought he dipped a spoon in the icing and shoved it into her apron, er… more or less her tits.

"Oh so that's how it's gonna be then!" Pinkie took her icing bowl and dumped it on Hayz. Smiling proudly she turned around and went to fetch her cake out of the oven. Hayz slowly took the bowl off his head and decided those tits were his tonight. "I'm going to make you wish you had fat cock to fuck every day."

Their chase began. Pinkie ran screaming stranger danger and avoiding Hayz by slipping through his legs or jumping over him every time he dove at her. Eventually she threw some cupcakes at him yelling about how Molestia was perfect for him and he shouted back about how freakishly hot it was for her to have pink hair; the two finally settled down tired in the kitchen, covered in icing and cake mix, to catch their breath. Hayz looked down at Pinkie on the floor, "What time is it babe?"

She looked up at him and glanced at the clock he had on his wall, it's ten. Shit, when did it get so late? "It's ten, is there a time difference here? How did it get late so quick?" Hayz huffed a laugh,

"Because your ass has been avoiding a good spanking all evening. Ready to give up?" Pinkie got to her elbows and screamed at him, "Never!" He laughed and picked her up, Pinkie decided she was too tired to really put up a fight. It was a long day, between running around new towns and cake fights she had her fill. Pinkie Pie has her fill? Is she craze? Probably.

"Pinkie I'm getting in the shower. Care to join me?" Pinkie mumbled a yes and Hayz stared down at the blob of tired pony in his arms. Hey she said yes, he was going for it.

He opened a door with his foot and almost succeeded in falling down. Mumbling he put Pinkie down and ran some water in the tub. Sure this place wasn't the biggest or fanciest but he preferred it simple. His bath should be able to fit the two comfortably; he cleaned his mask while waiting for the tub to fill. He shut it off when it almost hit the brim and stripped off everything but his shorts. He looked down at Pinkie again and sighed.

"Pinkie. Wake up; bath time." She mumbled something that sounded like a 'fuck off' and he picked her up again. He was debating taking her apron off since she was almost nude.

"... Fuck it." He sat her down and shook her awake, once she opened her eyes and saw Hayz she smiled and said Gummy liked bubble baths. He laughed and pulled the strings on her back and lifted the loop over her head; now her shorts.

"Take 'em off Pinkamena." He demanded, "Mm kaay." She stood up poking her small fingers in the rim of her shorts and yanked them down to her ankles. She stood up quickly and proudly put her hands on her hips. He chuckled at her silliness and told her to get in the tub. She kicked off her bottoms and slid in the bath; there weren't any bubbles she noticed at first, so she put her mouth in the water and made funny noises. The water got a big higher on her head she noticed. When she lifted her head and wiped away the water she saw Hayz sitting at the other end of the tub watching her.

"… Gummy attack!" And she threw Gummy at him. Gummy smacked his face and it knocked his head back. Slowly Gummy slid into the water and Hayz did too mumbling about how girls were stupid.

"You just wanted an excuse to see me all exposed! Well I've got something to tell you! I—"

"How do you feel about winter?" He asked, cutting her off. Pinkie sat there and tilted her head to the side. "Well I enjoy it! I mean, duh, who doesn't? I'm a pro skater!" She exclaimed. He smiled a creepy smile in Pinkie's opinion and she tried to scoot away when he suddenly got a little too close.

Hayz settled in between her legs and got nose to nose with Pinkie. She looked nervous but that was always fun about Pinkie; making her flustered. "Well we have a guest to visit in the next town; by the water. A certain man named Frost should be there." Pinkie stared at Hayz and wasn't sure what to expect. He reclined back to his side of the bath and picked up Gummy. He stared at the little guy until he tossed Gummy back at Pinkie yelling "Attack of the green thing!"

"AHHHH! Oh god it has my very soul! I'm melting into confetti!" She flailed about in the tub making water go everywhere and he laughed at her while Gummy chewed her hair.

His thoughts went back to Frost. Bitch has to pay up sometime.

Pinkie couldn't believe what she was seeing. Hayz couldn't believe what he was seeing. There was Jack Frost, sitting on a bar stool at a weird ocean bar with a merman floating beside him. And he was huge! Pinkie thought this was just great! Hayz thought something more along the lines of 'what the shit, he's gay for mermen now?' Pinkie squealed in joy and bounced up and down around Hayz. Hayz was trying to comprehend how the shit he got so big. He noticed the bartender had bottles of a purple liquid on a shelf with little cakes of all sorts as well. Ah.. that's how; those food and drinks from Wonderland.

"Hayz is that really Jack Frost?" She asked gleefully, "Yeah… Yeah that's the big loaf. Okay Pinkie baby, time to show your magic. See his left shoulder? Get up there." Pinkie squealed again and bounced over to the stool he was on, she did a quick observation in her head and saw that if he stood up, she would only reach his waist.

"She's a fucking spider monkey… I swear she is." He mumbled as he saw her twirl and bounce up to Jack's shoulder. Jack turned to see what had landed on him and noticed a pink blob. A very smiley and bouncy pink blob.

"Hey there. You lost shorty?" Pinkie squealed again and hugged his face as best she could, then she gasped loudly and took off down his arm and left the room. Jack looked back to his little merman and shrugged; finally he noticed Hayz in front of him leaning on his glass of Bacardi. "Hey there buddy." Jack paled , if he could get any paler.

"Frost, who is this?" Hayz turned to the merman and eyed him carefully. Never knew what the ocean could throw out; Jack leant down to Hayz and poked him carefully. "Misha, this is Hayz. What are you doing here Hayz?"

"Well I'm away for a while and decided I'd come back to see if you were ready to own up. You have something I need."

"And what is that? Last I recall I saved your ass." Hayz smiled behind his mask, "That blue gem. I need to show it to that pink ball of happiness you met just a second ago."

Jack smiled down at Hayz and stood up from his seat; Misha floated around him and eventually settled on wrapping himself around Jack's neck. He picked up a bottle of the purple potion and some of the cakes; he picked up Hayz and started to leave. Hayz wondered where Pinkie could have gone. Jack brought them to an elevator and they waited talking. As soon as the doors opened they were covered in confetti and Pinkie was blabbing to everyone, people who walked by stopped and laughed at her silliness but she didn't seem to care too much. Eventually Hayz jumped down and pulled Pinkie into the elevator with Jack and Misha.

"What a weirdo" Misha floated down to Pinkie and she saw close up how big he really was; and how blue he was.

"Hi I'm Pinkie Pie!" She hugged him and he slithered out of her touch sneering down at her the higher he rose, "Misha play nice. So Miss Pinkie, apparently I'm to show you something." He smiled down at her.

"Huh?" She smiled innocently and scooted closer to Hayz; he wrapped an arm around her and she wrapped around him as well face to his chest. "I don't like it here." She whispered to him, he looked down at her and whispered back, "Don't worry I'm sure you will soon enough." She looked back up at him but stayed close. She glanced back to Misha and he was still sneering down at her.

So she did the most rational thing that came to mind: she flipped him the finger and told him to eat her.

Hayz laughed; Jack snorted with laughter and couldn't contain his giggles; Misha looked to Jack offended and got down to Pinkie's height glaring all the while. "Little girl I'd watch your little mouth." He circled around her with his tail and wrapped her up.

All the way out of the elevator and down the hall she complained he smelled like fish but refused to let Misha go. He then complained she smelled sickly sweet of sugar and tried to get free without hurting her. God forbid he had Jack turn him into a popsicle.

A short while later, as well as a few drinks and cakes because of accidnets, Hayz was as big as Jack and Misha had returned to snuggling into Jack's neck. Pinkie looked up at the both of them and exclaimed she was too tiny and wanted to be big too. Hayz knelt down and held up a small vile, "Pinkie this will make you shrink. And this," He held up a cake, "Will make you grow. Take a small bite okay?" He held it down to her and she bit into the cake.

Pinkie noticed she got bigger and soon saw everything as the boys did. Hayz put the cake down and stood tall against Pinkie, he was a head and a few inches taller than her. "Ah it's close enough." Pinkie was excited and ran all over Jack's apartment. Eventually she jumped onto the couch next to them and snuggled on Hayz like Misha was to Jack; she stuck her tongue out at him and asked why he was so glued to Jack.

"In case you haven't noticed, I don't exactly look like a regular merman. People are weird fucks around here. I don't want to be sushi any time soon." And with that he flicked his tail and wrapped it around Jack's wandering fingers.

"Frost." Jack looked back to Hayz and sighed. He got up and left the room; Pinkie exclaimed he had the bluest eyes she ever saw! Hayz laughed and told her to go look in a mirror. She snorted and said "PFFT please. I work out every morning; I get up, make funny faces in my mirror to pump up my day! My eyes aren't _THAT_ blue!"

Jack came back and told Pinkie to hold out her hand. She hesitantly did and noticed his hands were cold to the touch; she stared at his face. He smiled at her and she looked down again to her hands. Her eyes widened and she jumped off the couch and jumped Jack. The two fell over; Pinkie ecstatic, Jack laughing. Misha was floating over by the window reading a book. When he went over there, Hayz didn't know.

He turned back to Pinkie, "Is that the right gem?" Pinkie jumped off Jack and then jumped Hayz, which didn't really do much since she was sitting down. So it was more like she was straddling his lap bouncing up and down. He made hand symbols to Jack saying 'heaven' and held onto Pinkie's hips.

"My gem; my gem, my gem, my gem, my gem, MY GEM! Hayz how did you know he would have it? Dear Molestia! Do you have a red, purple or fuchsia gem?" She towards Jack pleadingly.

"No my dear I don't. I happen to have gotten this from Misha." Pinkie ran at Misha and yanked him down deciding he deserved all her love. "Where did you find this!" She all but yelled towards him, "He closed his book and spelled it to float around, "I was swimming around in my cave; when I left I noticed something shiny along the shore line. Quite frankly it makes me look quite a dull blue in comparison so I decided to make it go away. I gave it to jack." She screamed and smiled and all but cried rubbing her face into Misha claiming he was a beautiful shade of blue.

She didn't let go of him for the rest of the night.

Once Jack and Hayz were alone, Jack turned to him and ripped off his mask. "What are you really doing with her?" He had that serious cold look to him again. "I'm not doing shit with her; I can barely get a lick in!"

"Hayz you know damn well what I meant. What are you going to do with her when she has all those gems? Are you going to let her go off or are you going to make her another slave?"

Hayz returned Jack's cold glare with one of his own, "I prefer the term 'lover' but hey whatever works." Jack shook his head and sighed. "Are you or not? I'm taking her away now if you are."

"I don't fucking know alright!" He looked up at Hayz and saw he was looking down. "I don't fucking know. I was going to kill the bitch when I found her in my tunnels, but she was so desperate and fucking cute that I couldn't!" Hayz leant over and put his head in his hands,

"I took her home and in the past week I grew attached to her and that annoying bubbly pink hair of hers! I want to keep her and make her scream until the dawn but fuck dude, she makes it hard to be mean…and she has this thing! It's a toothless alligator! She named it Gummy… It gnaws on me constantly." He lifted his head and put his arm out to prove his point. Gummy was, not surprisingly, attached to him again.

Jack laughed and said it was cute. Hayz pulled Gummy off and put him on his lap. "Yeah it's cute.."

"So what made your steel heart decide, in a week no less, to keep this pinkette? She is quite cute." He commented trying to make Hayz calm down.

"Her attitude is always happy. I can't help but be happy too…and she wears those unholy, frilly… THINGS!" Jack thought about it and realized she was wearing quite the outfit. Before he could say anything Hayz continued, "And don't even bro." he pointed to Jack who held his hands up in mock surrender with a smile, "When I found her she had this skimpy pink two piece and it was frilly as fuck. The things she wears are deadly I'm sure of it. I had to go out and get her something." Jack cocked a brow and Hayz continued, "She had one outfit and I caved… so I bought her come more skanky little things. She enjoys them and I happily enjoy watching her cute ass." He crossed his arms and sat back against the couch.

Their talk continued for a while until a screaming Pinkie came out being chased by, an enlarged greatly, Misha. She ran at Hayz and dove over him behind the couch and Misha followed suit. They heard rustling and both decided to look together. Misha and Pinkie were smooshed together on the floor with Misha wrapped around Pinkie like a glove. He looked flustered and she was giggling happily.

"Misha, I'm hurt. You left me for Pinkie? You only just met!" He feigned mock hurt, and covered his eyes dramatically. Misha turned a purplish color when he was blushing. "She demanded I be hers. And I said no. And then she demand I let her at least feed me her cake and I said no again. So she cornered me and threw the cake at me," he lifted his tail to show the cake smeared there, "And she missed. So I chased her and here we are."

Again Jack feigned mock hurt and threw himself over a chair sighing. Pinkie looked at Hayz and he looked back down at her. "He took my mask off. More like my head but it was my mask."

Pinkie got up and Misha unraveled himself from her to go sit with Jack. Jack looked up and realized Misha was way too big. "How much did you eat?"

"A whole cake. I like being big, makes me feel more…" He circled Jack and wrapped his arms around his neck; his tail around his body as best he could, "Dominant."

"PFFT Fuck that Misha, you're always going to be my little mermaid." Misha strung out a select choice in words while Pinkie and Hayz watched laughing. She was looked at her gem and smiling brightly when he whispered in her ear.

"Another time change was made to get here. We may have left early but it's about two in the morning here, it stays night all the time though. Want to head home?" She turned to him so their heads were side by side, "That's why it was so dark out when we got here! What time will it be when we get home?"

"Time is weird at Ocean Shore Bar. It should be the next day at home." Pinkie gasped and thought about it. She decided she wanted Misha to come. "Can I take Misha?"

"I'm sorry baby but he belongs here." He moved to look at her and she turned to look at Misha and Jack arguing about the little mermaid.

"Can we stay here?" She asked hopefully, "For sure babe. But you gotta sleep nude with me." He went back to his pose earlier, arms crossed. "Okay but I get Misha too!" She exclaimed happily and stripped off her shorts and top and grabbed Misha; she dragged him into the bedroom they were just in and tossed him in the bed. She dove under the covers and snuggled into his chest. "Hi!"

"… I finally get her to say yes, and I have to spend it with a merman cuddled into her naked body which means I can't… Fuck my life." He got up and walked into Jack's bedroom and saw the two mashed together again. Jack strolled in behind them and started to undress himself. He motioned for Hayz to get strip and get behind Pinkie.

Pinkie heard whispers and the sound of clothes rustling; soon she felt weight dip the bed next to her and next to Misha. She opened her eyes when she felt skin on her back and turned to see Hayz wrapped around her. Misha looked over his shoulder at a certain who was rubbing up and down his back. He turned back to Pinkie as she was turning back to him and decided he wanted to talk.

"Frosty here isn't gay in the least. He just knows how to love. And when I sneer down at you think nothing of it I'm just prissy." Pinkie giggled as Jack said 'hey!'

"Hayz acts all tough but he is a big softie who loves to play with bells. Service bells. And when I giggle at everything and act so happy it's because I really am happy. My name is Pinkie Pie!" She said happily and wrapped an arm around Misha as he wrapped an arm around her.

"We're sappy fucks." Pinkie snorted, "Yeah I know." They both sighed.

"Girls. Go to bed. Daddy's are tired." Jack had said and Misha smacked him with his tail, "I am NOT a girl assface." Hayz giggled and wrapped Pinkie tighter.

"Night Pinkamena." She sighed and closed her eyes. "I like it when you call me Pinkamena; reminds me of my daddy and mama. Night… Cranky doodle. Hehe."

The four of them fell asleep listening to each other mumble things that weren't really heard. Eventually Misha woke up chilly and realized he was the only one not under the covers. He slithered away from the arms and hands around him and crawled under from the foot of the bed. He wondered if Jack minded that they imposed like this. Probably not, he loves company. He fell asleep against Pinkie again wondering what tomorrow had to show, until his fin was kicked and then he thought of nothing but death.

This better not be a night of terror fish abuse…

**A/N:**** So… How was this chapter? Anything I should improve or change?  
Jack Frost and MLP FiM is not mine, nor is The Little Mermaid. Misha however, is mine. So is Lativia.  
Alice in Wonderland and anything related to such is also, not mine.**

**I plan to draw Misha. I'm good at drawing sea creatures so I'll give it a shot. **


	7. Why Is My Foot Slimy?

**Chapter Seven**

**Why Is My Foot Slimy?**

**A/N:**** Still Rated M for crude language, mentions of sexual things and overall just because of Hayz and Pinkie's randomness. But everyone loves that.**

It was beyond terror fish abuse. Apparently Pinkie kicked in her sleep when she was excited; but wasn't she always excited? Misha decided to never sleep near her again, Hayz and Jack woke around the same time to Misha's squirming and glares towards Pinkie. Hayz propped himself on an elbow and looked down at the two. Jack stretched out and rolled around and suddenly fell out of the bed to the floor, not realizing how close to the edge he was, with a yelp. Pinkie jumped up on the bed wide awake screaming about how she wasn't the ruiner. When she gathered her bearings she whirled around beaming at Misha.

Misha's first thoughts were along the lines of: THIS IS HOW I DIE. He slithered out of the bed as fast he could but Pinkie dove after him and they landed on Jack.

"I've got cotton candy on me. Care for a bite Hayz love?" He scooped up the two and tossed them to the bed. Hayz laid down and put a pillow over his eyes mumbling about it being too early and everything was a dream because even he knew he had no chance of ever seeing Pinkie naked; dreams are cruel womensometimes. "Hayz wake up! I wanna go play! Let's have a party! Oh my gosh. Hold on to your hooves – I am just about to be brilliant!"

With those words she ran to the bathroom and slammed the door. It was then Hayz sat up and stared down the two other men. "She's really naked isn't she?" They both nodded yes and Hayz sighed wondering where his shorts were.

"Before you ask, Misha tends to hide clothing a lot in his sleep so he was probably the one who took them."

"Hey this time I'm innocent. The only thing I've hidden is your freakish porn collection." He opened the bathroom door and floated in to discover Pinkie only half dressed trying to put on a top. He sighed and closed the door. "Need help?" Pinkie turned around trying to cover herself as best she could in her situation. "Yes please. It has too many strings I think I messed it up." Misha took the top from her and sat himself on the counter. He unravelled the strings and told her to come closer, it took about ten minutes but she was dressed finally.

"You know this is quite cute. But I hate the color. Mind if I change it?" Pinkie beamed at him, "You know magic?!" He blinked confused.

"To an extent yes; I prefer just to make potions and such. But.. is this a surprise for you?" He turned her around to fix her straps a little more and was wondering what color would complement her. "Well no but to be honest, I've only ever seen the unicorns or the Pegasus Unicorns do magic before." Misha turned her around and raised a brow. "Unicorns or Pegasus Unicorns?" He asked.

"Yeah; Oh I come from Equestria! I live in Ponyville. Well… Use to live. The ponies lived in Ponyville, the Pegasi live in Cloudsdale and the Unicorns lived in Canterlot; Fluttershy lived in Ponyville though and she was a Pegasus. And Rarity lived in Ponyville too!" Misha looked a little confused and she explained it in a more simple way;

"We could all live where we wanted except Cloudsdale. You need to be a Pegasus to live in Cloudsdale haha!" Pinkie twirled and looked into a mirror. Misha was right, this color did look bad. "Hayz your color scheme sucks! Rarity would be in a state of shock!"

"Eat me bitch, I don't wear color that often! Are you dressed yet?" He swung open the door and Jack popped up behind him. They both gasped and grabbed onto each other.

"Toppled over Buddha!" They exclaimed in union. Pinkie was on the floor sitting on one shin with her other legs knee to her chin; she was hunched over with an arm above her head ready to grab onto something and the other tucked but ready to grab as well; her face made a frown 'o' and her eyes looked angry.

Misha sighed and told them to get out; that is was girly time. This started so many jokes and laughter of the two boys and Misha slammed the door. "Okay Pinkie close your eyes." Pinkie closed them and felt very chilly. When she opened her eyes to face the mirror she squealed happily at how her outfit looked now. It had a pattern like Misha's scales and was the same blue. She eyed him lazily with a smirk. "You're such a narcissist Misha."

"Guilty as charged." He twirled around her and Pinkie opened the door. They both stopped and didn't really understand what they saw but apparently it was toppled over Buddha time. Hayz and Jack were on the bed in Buddha poses.

"Hey… That's my thing!" They laughed and got out of their poses to move into the sitting room. Pinkie followed suit with Misha still wrapped around her; Pinkie was strangely quiet when Hayz turned back to her. She smiled and waved at him.

"You're quiet now. Something wrong?" He asked; Pinkie shook her head. "No I'm just thinking. What time is it at home now? We haven't been here a full day yet, the clock says so." Hayz glanced to the clock and thought about it. "It's well into the next day. Almost night again. Hey, don't change the subject!"

"I didn't! I was curious.. I want to keep Misha." Hayz put on a stern face, "No Pinkamena. He belongs here." Jack watched on quietly; Misha turned to him with a saddened, confused face. Jack kept his face soft and smiling but shook his head. Misha let go of Pinkie and floated back to over to him.

"I like Misha.. He reminds me of Twilight Sparkle; and Rarity. But he isn't as snooty as they can get sometimes." Pinkie sat down sighing and wondering if she would ever see her friends again. She played with a curl of pink while the boys talked.

"Pinkie?" Pinkie looked up towards Jack; his face was smiling and eyes were warm. "Misha is a merman. He needs the water. He can't travel with you like Hayz can," Jack tugged on Misha's tail, "He swims and can barely float. He would be killed if something happened to pop out at you. Hayz is quick but not that quick."

Pinkie sighed, "I know that. But come on; who doesn't want to keep a fish? I—" Pinkie paused and looked around the room. Her eyes settled on Hayz before she turned back to Jack, "I just want more company. It's hard when you're the only pony."

Misha couldn't figure out why Pinkie paused and looked at Hayz; Hayz was twirling around looking for something; Jack stood up and was watching Hayz as Pinkie continued.

"Okay what the fuck is wrong?" Misha and Hayz exclaimed at the same time.

"I was looking for Gummy." She stated plainly.

Both boys turned to each other and sighed. Jack snorted and began laughing when he noticed Gummy was attached to Hayz's leg gnawing away as usual.

"Fucking thing… Why does it do this?!" Hayz yanked Gummy off and threw him at Pinkie.

"I don't know! He's toothless! Maybe he's teething?!" Pinkie held up Gummy and rubbed her nose against his and cooed to him, "Are you Gummy? Are you finally getting some teeth? Oh you have been toothless for so long! Can you even get teeth? Well open and let Pinkie see!"

Pinkie held Gummy carefully in one hand and opened his mouth with her other hand; Gummy gripped himself around Pinkie's hand as she looked inside his mouth.

Hayz stood next to Jack and was mumbling about how Gummy's eyes reminded him of that purple haze he tried once. "You're not still into that shit are you?"

Hayz looked into Jack's eyes; "No?" Jack sighed and put an arm around him. "Look, do you really think _that_," He pointed to Pinkie, "Is going to be into that kinda thing? That girl is like the hell spawn of Barbie and Godzilla on crack in a dungeon on Tuesday Dance Fight nights."

Hayz snorted crossing his arms across his chest. He looked to Pinkie and stared as she twirled around with Gummy obviously done with checking if he was teething and was now playing. "Yo, Pinkamena." She stopped twirling and changed into a ninja pose. "Pinkie isn't here right now; please leave a message at the alligator."

"Ever get into any weird drugs?" Pinkie stood up and grabbed a sofa cushion; she threw it at Hayz and he caught it with his face. "How dare you ask me something like that! No pony would ever! You're so gross!"

"Well that was a no." Misha chuckled and wrapped himself around Pinkie. Jack patted Hayz's back as Hayz held the pillow to his face; she thought he was gross?

Hayz threw the pillow down and gave his best pitiful look, "She thinks I'm gross!" And with that he ran out the door with his mask sounding like a little girl.

"I don't understand what just happened." Pinkie stated as she stared at the door. Jack gave a snort and led her and Misha out the door, grabbing his keys along the way. "Neither do I. Got everything?" He paused, asking in the doorway. Pinkie untangled herself from Misha, who in return wrapped himself around Jack, and ran back to the bedroom and grabbed their two bags and ran out past the two screaming after Hayz, "Wait! You can't leave me here! I don't know how to get back home! Hayz don't make me get the cake!"

Jack closed and locked his door smiling; he slowly strolled down the hall wondering how these two ever decided that working together would be a good thing.

Pinkie had run into the lobby and stopped in her tracks. She didn't know where she was going or who was around. She stared at the many faces that turned to her as she made her abrupt entrance. Pinkie stared back looking for Hayz. She spotted him sitting at the bar talking to a strangely dressed man; he looked as if he was from the seventies. She put on Hayz's backpack and slung her bag around her shoulder. She walked up to the two men and noticed there was a small girl sitting on the weirdo's lap. She had a green and black corset dress on with black Mary Jane shoes and she had sharp green eyes to match her outfit. She had waist length black hair with straight across bangs and with alabaster skin; she looked no more than sixteen.

Pinkie stared at her and she stared back until the two men noticed the girls' silent conversation. Hayz reached around and took Pinkie closer to him by her waist whispering in her ear, "This is Murdock and Letonía, Murdock owns a good portion of the islands out on the water past this lake." Pinkie nodded her head and turned her gaze to Murdock; he looked rather old to have such a young girl on his lap. Suddenly Pinkie gasped and turned to face Hayz,

"You… are the biggest poophead I have ever met!" She all but screamed at Hayz. He flinched back and put his arms up in defense as pinkie continued, "I said I thought doing those things was gross, not that you were gross! Everyone will have a different opinion about it! And then you leave me there?! I should smack you a good one with Celestia's crown!" Pinkie gasped and gave Hayz a deadpan stare,

"I'm telling on you!" She screamed and stomped away to the end of the bar with Gummy silently gnawing on her hair.

Letonía stared at the Pink haired girl and directed her gaze back to a whimpering assassin, she gave him her flattest look, "Well that could have gone better for you. Where the hell did you leave her anyway? Not from around these parts either I noticed; Equestrian?" She asked.

Hayz looked to Letonía and spoke quickly with his arms still raised, "I'm not sure if I should be scared of you too." She huffed and crossed her arms with Murdock patting her head chuckling deeply at his little ones childish behaviour and spoke quietly,

"Quite a firecracker then, eh? Letonía, why don't you take your pocket money and go entertain the little bird? She might fancy another broad around." Letonía slipped off of Murdock and left the two men to talk about how scary women were. Letonía found Pinkie talking to someone she didn't think Hayz would like her to see; as she walked up, the boy closed his mouth and frowned at Letonía.

"Well what brings you to this cavern?" She asked leaning onto Pinkie's arm. Pinkie stared confused between the two until she remembered who he was. She gasped and exclaimed she knew she had seen him before. Letonía looked at Luka and promptly stood up and walked away dragging Pinkie by her arms. Pinkie waved goodbye and smiled a bright smile, Luka smiled and waved back.

"Murdock; Hayz." Letonía spoke with dominance in her voice and instantly gathered the men's audience. Hayz slouched down instantly dreading something would happen and Murdock chuckled in his deep voice again. "What is it love?" Pinkie snapped her head around and pointed towards Murdoc, "British accent!" She all but beamed at him and Letonía held her down. "I give warning in case he tries to take you home." She deadpanned.

"Hayz," Letonía addressed him again, this time he turned to look at her. "Your mask is creepy. And Luka is here, watch what you drink or he might make you forget Pinkie out of jealousy." Hayz instantly turned to the end of the bar and indeed did see Luka chatting to some waitress. He swore under his breath and looked to Pinkie. She was looking at him with a blank face that turned into a smile, she grabbed his hand holding it as she moved herself closer until she was pressed against him and she was playing with his fingers claiming they were calloused. She tried to sit up on his lap and he scooped her up laughing at her giddy face. She buried her face in his neck and started to whisper to him,

"Hayz I know it was Luka who unlocked your pipe. I know JJ and Ra want me gone or at the very least brain dead. Like a chicken, BAGAWK!" Hayz had stopped moving and just stared ahead. After a short time he excused himself and Pinkie from Murdock and Letonía; he said they would visit again after. Hayz put Pinkie down and she looked up at him wondering what was wrong. She saw Jack and Misha coming around a corner and waved. They waved back but Jack and Hayz had a silent agreement; they would talk after.

Suddenly a song was playing Pinkie thought she knew. "Hayz." Pinkie shook his arm and looked up at him. He said nothing but shuffled around his clothes for his phone. Pinkie looked down suddenly feeling weary and unPinkie like.

She bent down to take Gummy off his leg as Hayz was checking the message he received. Pinkie gave a yelp and shot up with Gummy in her hands, Hayz had slapped her rump quite hard. She looked towards his mask with a glare when she noticed he was a little too close.

"Is something wrong?" She asked in her happiest voice. He nodded and took his bag from around her and hers as well while taking her hand and guiding her away. "Hayz I want verbal answers!" Again he said nothing. "Please?" Still nothing.

"Hayz I could care less if you called me babe, sugartits, honey lips, or whatever! But at least talk to me; don't make me get my cupcakes!"

"You really wore off on me you know and in like what, four days? I mean, FUCK babe. I used to not give two shits about people, I'd always chase ass but now that it's here in front of me I don't want it, my moods are changing like the fucking seasons, and to top it all? I have seen you naked. Nice cutie mark by the way. Mind if I see more?" He stopped walking and turned to Pinkie wrapping his arms around her. She looked up to him and beamed,

"I'm contagious!" She giggled, "Why did we leave everyone, because of Luka?" She asked.

Hayz sighed and sat down on a bench, Pinkie took in the view of where they were. She sat down with Hayz and held his hand. He was rubbing his thumb on her fingers when he started to talk again, "Pinkie babe, I'm supposed to be nasty. You make me feel giddy as fuck and it's weird. I didn't give two shits about what would happen to you when I met you. Now I just want to keep you."

Pinkie sighed and looked around. She noticed Luka on a balcony above them and wondered if he could see and hear them. Hayz's voice brought her out of her thoughts, "Luka is like a like fuck buddy to everyone. But he gets jealous very easily, and—" Hayz abruptly stopped talking and looked down at his foot.

"Why the fuck is my foot slimy? Oh _FUCK ME,_ what did I step in?!" Pinkie started to laugh and continued to laugh more when Hayz started to moan about it being so gross. Finally he stopped moving and stared at his boot. "This is… The nastiest thing I have ever, EVER, stepped in."

Pinkie snorted once more and poked his foot. She wailed loudly about how it was slimy and Hayz threw his hands up in a way that said 'What did I just bitch about?'

When they calmed down she turned to Hayz again, "What are we here for? This dock I mean." He looked into her eyes and said simply, "Luka is going to follow me now that he knows I'm here. He might be a friend but I don't trust this friend." Pinkie nodded in understanding. She looked towards Hayz again and spoke softly,

"Hey Hayz?" He turned to her and she was standing up making a weird face and what looked to be a chicken pose. "Um… yes Pinkie?" He started to giggle himself and she suddenly screamed,

"I'm not a Pinkie," She boomed, "_I'M A VELOCIRAPTOR!" _She proceeded to nip at Hayz as he burst out laughing and trying to inch away. Luka stared down at the sudden outburst of being a velociraptor. He saw Pinkie and Hayz laughing and decided he may have to pay another visit soon. He fished around in his pocket for a tube and noticed it wasn't there.

Luka looked all around himself and was confused. He bent over the balcony to see if he dropped it and sure enough, there it was on the ground broken. He started to laugh out loud thinking to himself,

_I pity the bastard that stepped in that. That shit is hard to get out. Wait… why the fuck is she a velociraptor…_

**A/N:**** Sorry about the wait on this chapter. I've had some things clouding my mind and I forgot it was sitting silently waiting to be finished. I can't seem to focus too much this evening either! Drat. I'm sorry if it isn't up to par. Hayz is like, all over the place. But then again, I did make him to be rather weird.  
Murdock and ****Letonía are my OC's; they will make sudden appearances here and there along with previous characters.  
MLP FiM is not mine. I wish it was, but it isn't! *dramatic cry scene*  
… Who doesn't want to be a freaken velociraptor? Honestly…  
**


	8. She Doesn't Walk, She Bounces

Chapter Eight

She Doesn't Walk, She bounces…

"Never have I seen such a cunning display of a velociraptor."

Pinkie and Hayz turned to the voice that interrupted them; Hayz was on the ground under a bench and Pinkie was nipping at him and walking around as a chicken.

"Heeeey buddy. Wanna help me out and scare away the Pinkasaur?" Hayz looked up to see Ra and JJ on the dock next to them. Pinkie wobbled herself over to them and began to nip at them; as quickly as she did she went back to guarding the bench Hayz was under claiming velociraptors couldn't swim.

Ra lifted an eyebrow, or he would if he had eyebrows, and sat on the bench. "Nope."

JJ was all smiles as he watched Pinkie freak out that Ra had sat on the bench Hayz was under. Eventually Pinkie stopped and smiled at the two men. "How come you guys are here? Last I saw you guys you wanted me gone!" Pinkie exclaimed with a look of mock hurt,

"Well this is where many people and creatures come. I guess it was just a coincidence that we happen to be here the same time as you. And Luka really." JJ explained, "Honestly we just come here to be alone sometimes. Ra likes the quiet and he happens to love the bar. All of the old school brandy and cigars!"

Pinkie glance over to Ra and he was bent over talked to Hayz who was now on his back, rather than on his side, under the bench chatting away as if he were normal. Pinkie looked back to JJ and she suddenly lurched back; the boys stopped and stared at her and she laughed. "Is something wrong?" JJ asked; he was uncertain if he had looked at her funny. Pinkie looked over the lake and spoke,

"I felt a raindrop and it startled me. Look," She said whilst pointing out towards the lake, "You can see the rain coming down from out there."

"Ah don't worry, it's just the water fairies. Let's go back in; they tend to bring a lot of rain when too many of them are in one place." Ra explained and stood; Hayz rolled out from under the bench and grabbed their bags. "Actually, we came out here to catch the ferry across the water. If Luka is lurking around I don't want Pinkie to be caught by him." Hayz began.

Ra and JJ looked thoughtful and Pinkie was yelling again, "Where were we going?!" She did her dramatic gasp and spoke again, "Were we going to Lake Oblongata?!" Ra and Hayz had no idea what she was talking about but JJ matched her gasp and yelled back, "Holy shit you play that game too!" and they started a never ending chat about the game.

"How did we end up with the two weirdest people around?" Hayz asked Ra, who in return shrugged and answered, "Not a fucking clue. They both have a cute ass?" Both glanced down at said rumps on their excited partners and nodded in agreement.

"I deem that a worthy response." And with that subject decided, it started to pour down on the four.

Ra had suggested they sit in his private lounge on the upper levels of the hotel and bar; they meaning our crazy Pinkie, Hayz, JJ and Ra. Murdock and Letonía had also joined them, but were hesitant when Pinkie started to throw cake at Letonía who in return threw a chair.

"You threw a chair at me!" Pinkie screamed happily and threw Gummy into Letonía's arms. "I deem thee worthy of holding thy own alligator! Praise the all mighty toothless one!" Pinkie screamed again and ran away to another room. Letonía looked into her arms at the small alligator and it blinked one eye then slowly the other at her. Slowly she put him down and stepped back from the craziness. "Murdock, I fear she may be one gear loose, or missing, from a whole clock tower."

"I'll go find her." JJ mumbled getting to his feet to go find Pinkie while Letonía was serving drinks to everyone who was chatting. Ra insisted that Hayz take Pinkie back to Equestria while Murdock questioned about the inhabitants of that country. The three men, Ra hesitantly however, decided it would be better to keep Pinkie away from everything going on there despite how Ra thought she didn't belong in this world, she would have to go back eventually but now wasn't the time. Ra sighed, "Letonía would you please make me a Bacardi and cola? Preferably a very strong one?" He glanced over to her,

"Sure. In return however you have to promise me that JJ will never conform to those women in the talking box." She replied with a blank face and left to the bar, "The TV? Dude you still haven't taught her what a TV is?" Hayz looked over to Murdock with a face of disbelief. Letonía had returned with a small glass in hand, Ra had mentioned strong so she had done so. Handing it to him she quietly sat down listening about the talking box.

"The telly is a waste of time. Rots the brains out, it does; wouldn't do if love here couldn't tear her eyes away now could it?" Murdock asked whilst sipping his drink with a smirk.

"If I let Pinkie watch TV she freaks the fuck out about how that show about the ponies looks nothing like they should. You should have seen her the other night, she claims it was based off of Equestria and they just changed people into ponies. I mean whatever; people make weird shows every day. But it's fucking scary man, they all sing and shit and they're so fat!" Hayz claimed.

"I TOLD you that it was a load of oatmeal! I look nothing like her! And Rainbow Dash?! If Rainbow Dash ever touched makeup I'm sure she would EXPLODE! And Twilight Sparkle has purple hair with a pink stripe! And bangs! Her hair isn't purple and white stripes! What is she, a Cruella Deville knockoff?!" Pinkie suddenly appeared ranting to everyone about how the show was not accurate. "And another thing! Does it look like I'm a horse?! Do I have a horse face?!" She screamed making an awkward face Hayz couldn't describe. "Um… Are you making a horse face now?" He asked. "Yes. Yes I am." She replied with a normal face then went back to making said face.

"Then yes. Yes you do have a horse face." Hayz replied and Pinkie replied with a big gasp and went to sit down on a big chair. JJ followed in after a while and kneeled in front of Pinkie. "Can I ask you something?" He asked her with a smile. "Sure!" She beamed and sat up nose to nose with JJ.

"Why does your skin have a pink tint? Like, you're a pale pink. A very pale pink." Everyone turned to Pinkie as she looked at her own skin. "You really need to get out more." She replied nose to nose then stood, beginning to jump around the room. "That doesn't answer my question Pinkie! Can I at least have a chunk of your hair or skin to fuck around with?" Sulking, JJ sat between Ra's legs.

"Okay time to go home before JJ starts experiments on my stalker." Hayz said and began to stand. Murdock and Letonía excused themselves as well and made off before Hayz and Pinkie. Hayz turned to Ra, "I'll be seeing you again soon wont I?"

"Probably. And by the way, expect Luka back at your base." He said with a serious face, Hayz sighed dramatically and yelled for Pinkie to hurry her ass up so they could go. "WHEEE, let's go!" And she made her way to the door. JJ suddenly appeared next to Hayz making him jump a little, "Jesus fuck, don't do that." He giggled a little towards his masked friend. When he had put it back JJ wasn't too sure.

"She doesn't walk, she bounces." Both boys turned to JJ and looked over to Pinkie who was indeed, bouncing. "That's… kinda creepy. Not gonna lie." Ra exclaimed.

"Of all the things you're weird about, people only notice the bouncing?" Hayz began to walk away talking to Pinkie about her weird qualities and habits while the two Gods snickered behind them. As they left the room Ra turned to JJ as JJ turned to him. Both knowing that it was rare they were alone together nowadays, they decided now would be the best time for some fun that should involve a car and a lot of money.

They hadn't played monopoly in a while, it was missed.

Eventually our duo decided home would be best, the ferry could wait for another night. While the two were walking, Hayz really noticed how Pinkie was bouncy when she walked, or rather she herself was very… bubbly. "Kay random question time babe; Are you ever scared of ANYTHING? Like, fuck. That happy face is really starting to wear on me and I'd much rather be chasing ass then being retardedly happy." Hayz questioned her,

"Hey, it's just who I am! I wake up early every morning to train for the days! But I remember when I was small and afraid of things my Grammy Pie used to tell me that hiding wasn't the way to deal with fears at all. She told me to stand up tall and learn to face them and that if I did, that I would see my fears wouldn't hurt me and laughing will make them disappear." She explained still bouncing around, Gummy flopping along attached to her hair.

Somewhere between her explanation they turned into a yard with a gate, "Hey! I never noticed this gate before!" Pinkie exclaimed,

"That's because it was open when we first came here." Hayz explained unlocking the door of the house and ushering her inside, "I tend to lurk more towards the cutie houses. People don't expect people like me in a yellow house with garden gnomes outside and a koi pond." Hayz explained tossing their bags onto the couch whilst making his way to the kitchen, "Let's face it babe, I'm all six foot four of terrifyingly awesome ninja skills."

Pinkie stared at him with mock fear and followed him into the kitchen; remembering her mess before they left she noticed that everything was still exceedingly chipper. "Oh great one of awesome ninja skills, has thee broken the fourth wall yet?!" Hayz turned to her from his adventures in the fridge and threw a pickle at her. "Fourth wall?" He asked, "Yes." She replied with all seriousness.

They both stared at each other for a time before Hayz ripped his mask off and gave her a look of disbelief, "Does it look like we're in a story or a cartoon?" He asked. Pinkie bent over the counter with her head in her hands, elbows on the counter. "Well.. you never know!" She yelled and threw a cupcake that Hays could have sworn came out of nowhere.

"No more baking supplies for you." And with that he shut the fridge door and went to eat his other pickle in peace. Pinkie laughed at his retreating form and glance around the kitchen frowning.

"Gummy. I don't think I like how everything looks. Let's take down all the decorations."

Gummy blinked awkwardly at her and made a hissing sound towards Pinkie. She put him on the counter and began to clean her mess and take away all the streamers and balloons. As she picked up a bowl she had used for cake mix she stared sadly into its remains, "I wonder how Mr. and Mrs. Cake and the twins are doing…" She whispered mostly to herself, Gummy made more noises and knocked over some bowls to lick at. Pinkie sighed and quickly started to put dishes into the sink to clean.

About an hour later Hayz was on the couch upside down eating his pickle, still, when he thought it was kind of quiet for the party pony. He rolled off the couch and noticed the decorations Pinkie had set up were gone; he walked into the kitchen to find it clean and the dishes drying on the counter. Pinkie was nowhere to be seen so he started to roam around the house, eventually his search led him upstairs to the spare room he had. Cautiously he poked his head inside and saw Pinkie sitting on the bed with Gummy, she had all her things unpacked and was looking at a photo on the bed. What he really noticed however, was that her hair was pin straight now and looked a little off parted to the side.

"Well I have to admit I like your hair curly and wavy rather then it being straight." Pinkie snapped her head up to see Hayz was looking at her from the doorway. "You're still eating that pickle?" she snapped at him,

Taken aback at her snappish response he snapped back, "Well sorry for commenting on that pink thing you call hair, and who can't enjoy a pickle every now and again?" He eyed her cautiously and noticed Gummy crawling away in the corner of his eye, "Pinkie, are you okay?" He treaded lightly; opening the door all the way he came in and shut it behind him. When he turned around to face her, a shoe was thrown at the wall beside his head. "The fuck is wrong with you woman?" He demanded and sat on the edge of the bed facing her; that was when he noticed her face was red and wet, her eyes were puffy and she was wearing baggy shorts and a baggy shirt; of course being as smooth as he is, "Are you wearing my Pac-man shorts and my black wife beater?" Pinkie looked at her attire, "I have nothing else to wear." She said and smoothed out the shirt near her belly, when she looked up at him again he had aviators and was posing in a very womanly pose,

"Mmmm baby they look so GOOD on you!" Pinkie snorted out a laugh and proceeded to giggle uncontrollably as Hayz made weird faces and comments to her. "So now that I've got Happy Pinkie back, want to tell me what's wrong?" He asked, and glancing at her hair asked, "And why you decided to straighten your hair? It's not wet so you couldn't have just showered." He asked feeling her long pink mane.

Pinkie stared down at her photo again, "I miss my home, my family, and my friends. This was a picture of my friends and me." She explained giving Hayz the picture. He saw a purple haired beauty with pale skin, another purple haired beauty but she looked kind of nerdy and had a pink stripe in her hair and darker skin, a light pink haired shy looking woman, a small rainbow haired woman, a blond farm chick, and a small boy with green hair. "I'm assuming these girls hold an element each, like you." He assumed and Pinkie nodded and continued her explanation, "When I left Ponyville everything was going to hell. I left with Vinyl Scratch, apparently Octavia had gone crazy, when I couldn't find any of my friends. Everyone was turning on each other, at first I thought it was Discord coming to fuck up Ponyville again with his, I have to admit is awesome, chocolate rain; I never found the girls. I thought I saw Rainbow but it was just a chunk of her tresses, I hate to imagine the worst." She said softly laying back onto the pillows.

Hayz stared at the photo a moment longer and put it back down on her stomach. "What happened to Vinyl? I remember when I first met you that you had mentioned something about her."

Pinkie shrugged her shoulders, "For all I know Vinyl is still in your ruins. When I met you I assumed you would kill me or keep me hostage or something." Pinkie mumbled avoiding Hayz's gaze, his light caresses went unnoticed on her legs as she stared up at the ceiling. "Well…I'm a cold hearted person. In these short days though you seem to have rubbed off on me, but I suppose happy people rub off naturally on others. So forgive my bluntness, but she's probably dead." He deadpanned, Pinkie shot up from where she was laying and slapped him as hard as she could.

Hayz slowly moved his hands away from her alluringly pale, pink skin and sat up straighter, she had slapped him? Damn it hurt, he hadn't been slapped a good one in a while. Maybe he shouldn't be so blunt to a girl who is hurting inside. Or maybe he should just fuck her silly. He preferred the latter option, he quite enjoyed being blunt. He returned his roaming hands to her thighs and pulled her onto him so that she would face him, he didn't want her to look away but he doubted she would with those angry, blue eyes. "Well I deserved that but I think your panties are twisted too tight, maybe we should fix that the good old fashioned way? I prefer to be on top. I think I'd like it best if you started on your knees though…" With that Pinkie was tossed to the floor, she was in the process of getting up when she noticed she was between his knees. Hayz had his arms crossed and was staring down at her with his hard blue and green eyes. "Well… I suggest you get to it."

Slowly she righted herself onto her knees and brought her eyes to groin level. He was wearing a belt, she noticed, that had a rather large buckle. His shirt was covering most of it so Pinkie couldn't determine what exactly it was portraying. Glancing back up to Hayz and his hard eyes she lowered her head until the fabric of his jeans touched her lips… and she bit his thigh. He jerked away from her and Pinkie shot to her feet not a foot away from Hayz; he shrieked in a rather feminine pitch and scrambled back until he fell off the other side of the bed. They both stared at each other for what seemed like forever until Pinkie spoke, "You know… you're a real wimp." Hands on her hips she walked out of the room yelling for Gummy. Hayz sat quietly on the floor holding his thigh and pondered to himself about how she was so close she had gotten… he also realized his period of dominance will never be restored after such a girly shriek.

Sighing he hoisted himself up and begrudgingly trotted downstairs to find her on the couch upside down. He sat next to her and adjusted himself to be upside down as well. She looked over to his enticing eyes and sighed, "You aren't very good at being mean. You give up too easy and you're easily provoked." He too sighed, "I can't believe you fucking bit me. You know, unlike most women I meet, you happen to match my level of crazy. I like that. I also like how you make me shriek like a little girl." They remained silent for a moment longer until… "You know I wouldn't of actually made you right?"

"I know."

"Good." He sighed,

"You know I won't tickle your meat pole with my slug right?" Hayz barked a laugh and confirmed he knew she wouldn't but nevertheless enjoyed their moments of sexual awkwardness.

"So… Miss Pie, whatever did you do to your hair? Is it really this long? Fuck man… you must be a riot in bed! And imagine the mustaches you can pull off!" Hayz rolled himself so he landed onto his feet and knelt in front of her with her long hair across his face. "Babe… Babe, I'm Hulk Hogan." Pinkie giggled and snorted at all the impressions he was making with her hair. After an hour, she was sure it had been an hour, had gone by and Hayz was still making his impressions, Pinkie yanked her hair from him and righted herself onto the couch crossed legged. Hayz stood tall and watched her from above; Pinkie gasped and ran out of the room screaming chocolate rain. Hayz was dumbfounded and decided to follow her out while she had her bout of madness. Lo and behold, Pinkie had streamers for hair again. His eyes were wide and his face was of shock, Pinkie whirled around form the front door and was squealing madly; she ran from the house. Hayz grabbed his mask and ran after her screaming.

Pinkie was aware Hayz was screaming at her about how she wasn't dressed, how it was pouring like a waterfall and about how she had no shoes. _That's okay…_ Pinkie thought, _I never liked wearing shoes anyway._ Her heart pounded and her lungs begged for air yet she kept running. She was positive she saw her, she was absolutely sure it was her; rounding a corner she came to a halt looking down through her thick and now wet, mane. She thought her face would break if she smiled anymore, she thought she would lose her eyes if anymore tears flowed. She picked up the object and slowly made her way to the girl sitting down on a bench further ahead. Sitting down next to her Pinkie noticed she had cuts and scrapes everywhere, she was bruised and was breathing heavy; the words 'starving' and 'thin' came to mind. Pinkie started to cry again and couldn't help but jump the girl and wail to her. Upon realizing who this pink haired girl was, she hugged back fiercely and, she too, cried.

Hayz came to a halt around the corner mumbling about how Pinkie was fast. When he looked up Pinkie was crying with a girl on a bench. By their feet was a forgotten cowboy hat.

**A/N:** **Good, bad, don't care? Sometimes I don't make sense or I lose focus.  
Reviews are always nice. **


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